Letters.

Simple things can make my day. Simple things can break my day. I am a simple girl. Just put a few letters together and form words. Form sentences. Form paragraphs. Form essays. Words can make or break a sentence. A paragraph. An essay. Words can hurt. Words can make someone feel good. Words can make someone feel bad. I am usually good with words. I can be good with wording things to make people believe what I want them to believe. I do not lie. Sure sometimes I twist words. Who doesn't do that? Who doesn't twist words to make the lie into the truth? No one is perfect. We all sin. We are all sinners. You want to know the beauty of all that? God forgives our sins. Yes, he forgives our sins. In the end it does not matter how truthful or untruthful I am. I usually do not twist words. I never lie. I did when I was younger. It was my only defense. I had to stay out of trouble somehow. No kid is perfect. That is the truth. Letters are an amazing thing. They form the most beautiful of all things in the English language and that is words. Okay, say what you want. Call me a nerd. Call me weird. I do not care. I do not care what anyone thinks. I never have. It is not your job to judge me. If you do judge me, I am probably not friends with you. That is the end of that. At the beginning of the month, I was told that I was intelligent. The reason I was told that is because I did not agree with this person politically. This person cannot make up their OWN MIND! The beauty of politics is that they always twist words. They can get you to believe anything they want you to believe. It is simple. There are people who are paid to write their speeches. These people make good money to make the politics sound good. There are also people in charge of how people in the media come across. Public relations. They are paid good money just to make sure their people sound good. Wonders of words. It never ceases to amaze me. In an episode of Hung, a Detroit based television show about a male teacher who does prostitution on the side, some one said, "The only thing you are good at is punctuation." Maybe that is true to an extent about me. If there is anything that I have mastered it is how to proof read. Where to put the period. The Comma, the semi-colon; and where to put an explanation point! I know that the I goes before the C except after the C, or when it sounds like an A as in neighbor or weigh. That is one thing that will always stick with me. I am a basic English major. I love words. I love how they can make or break a conversation and a debate. Well that is all I have to say for now.

20 minutes for me.

Someday I want to write a masterpiece. I want to win awards. I want it to be a best seller. Until that day, I write. I type. This is my own world and no one can control anything I say in here. 20 minutes I will continue to type non-stop. I have to fix typos because I am too anal to leave them there for the world to see how bad of a typist I am. Most days I cannot go a minute without making a typo or two. I know I go on and on about memories. I think it is because I cherish all the ones I have made over the years. The memories I have made make me the person I am today. I can remember the most random combination of numbers but there are days when I cannot remember what I did the day before. Call me old fashioned but I still use a planner. I write down dates, work schedule, homework, etc. I write it. I do not use one of those fancy electronic planners. I write. In a planner. I purchase one every year and keep it in my purse. Weird? Maybe. For me it is the most convenient thing to do. And though I am pretty good at writing (or so I am told) there are always those certain words that I get hung up on. I always have think twice about how to spell certain words. Often times I have a harder time than normal expressing myself. Not a lot of people see this. My mom, dad and sister do. My best friend does. My closest friends probably do. I think my boyfriend does. My mom heard about a disorder on television relating to this. I do not know the exact term but it seemed like me. I seemed to have all of the symptoms. I almost want to ask my doctor about it. I just wish I could remember the name. My parents often think that I just do not want to do something. In all honesty, I think I have the memory of an Alzheimer's adult sometime. It is sickening how many things I forget over the span of just a week. I have to make sure that everything is always put in the same spot or I will not be able to find it. I have to be a creature of habit or my world will fall apart. My keys remain clipped to my purse when I am not using them. My shoes land wherever I take them off last. Since I normally take them off by the door, the are simple to find. Those habits make daily life that much easier to live. Then sometimes I get stuck in a rut. I will eat the same thing for about a month straight then realize that is all I have been eating and will not know what else to eat. It almost sounds like autism but I am pretty sure I am not autistic. I mean they would have detected that years ago. It is more like I am obsessive compulsive. While I have never been officially ( a word that for whatever reason took me three attempts to spell) diagnosed I often act like someone who is OCD. The older I get, the more anal retentive I get. It all goes back to making sure I am organized. It all goes back even to making sure I remember the important things in life. Well I think that was 20 minutes. I forgot to look at the timer this time. I will try to type some more tomorrow. And in 20 minutes you never know what will come out of my head. I cannot control what comes out of these fingers as I type. Hell, most of the time I cannot control what comes out of my mouth.

New direction (Non sense...enjoy)

I enrolled in a creative writing class in school. I am s actually quite ecstatic about it., This is going to be an easy A! The text book is super interesting and has been di filling up my brain with all kinds of ideas. I am going to talk *take a new direction for this blog. Fo From now on, no editing. No ma am. I am going to just free style type for 10 or 20 minutes a day and just see whazt what* comes out. you never know wqh what can cme come out of your head when you type or write for 20 minutes. This is going tin to be interesting. If you see typos or mispelt wods *misspelled words it is because I just left the wee errors there. I m am not going to prood proof or edit this guy at all. It is going to drive me crazy a little bit but we will see how this goes. I hope this also helps me better with typing and I become more accurate with it. Letr Let's* see hw how* this goes. No one knows. I have to read a book and write a 1-2 page critique on the paper. Then throughout the semester, I am required to write 30-40 pages of my choice. I can either write fiction or non-fiction. Either I will be writing a short memoir of my super ext exciting* life or I will be creaz creating my own fantasy world and wei writing* a fiction piece. I have always liked fantast fantasy* stories. I love the idea of being al able* to x create my own world and no one can tell me I am wrong. It is my world and no one knows it better than I do. And I mean NO ONE. J.K. Rowling did one of the best jobs when it comes to creating a world. That is just my ipi i opinion* though. Feel free to dispute it. No one can aruge w *argue what Hogwarts looks like. No one can um...say that no Hogsmeade is like this or Harry is reallt *really like this or that. It amazes me. I always have said that I want to go to Hogwarts. It seems like such an amazing phenomenal place and I want to see it. Sure I have seen the movies but it is just not the same. I want to experience Hogwarts. I mostly want to play Quidditch. How cool would that be?! Oh and I want to go see Fred and George's magic store. Though I am not sure the store is still open due to tragic happenings. (Okay I apologize, I u just*edited a bt bit*) This whold whole* free form editing this is harder for me that than* I thought it would be. Why do I care so much about proper se spelling and grammar? you could say it is an english major this. thing.* I think it is a controol this. thing* It is the one thing in my life that I feel no matter what I an can* always control. It does not matter how hectic life gets or how bad of a dat, day*, week, month, or year I am having. Grammar rules do noyt not* changte changte change*. How you spell words do not change. Every word is spelt the *spelled the same way no matter how life is going at that particular point in time. It is a comfort to know that when I get home tht i that* is the one thing that is consistent in my lifg lief life* Consistency is a fantat fantastic thing and is never overrated. You can never put a price on it. I just wish everything was consisten. consistent.* Oh, then I suppose i life would be boring if it was. I guess every noe now* and then we need a changte change* of pace to keep our simple minds o stimulated. It all goes bak back to how boring it is rto to* wat wait. It is proven in psychology that waiting is borinbg. borinbg. boring.* This is pary part * of the reason wi why IPOD touches and vi hand helo held viceo video* game consoles are so popular. They help to keep the mind stimulated so that the wait is not so horrible or borig. boring* Then again, they are not always the cure. For people that are important in a soldiers lives, a simple console will not help. I have found it best to keep busy wiyh with* work and school. It keeps my mind occupied and it helps me to kn not think abuo about* how much I miss Deving Devin* and vca cannot wait for him to be gom ho home( home** for good. 525 days until he is gom home* for good...but who is counting? No m Well, me and his mom are counting. Deving Devin* is counting. Soon enough he will be home and I will be able t to hold i him in my arms and I will not hae have to say good bye because we he* wil will* not be leaving me anytime soon at that point. I cannot wait for this all to be over! Well, there goes 20 minutes of non sense and typos! Talk to you all soon!

Guess who's back

Hey peeps! It has been awhile. I have been busy...(slacking off I suppose) Devin was in town for a few weeks and I while he was here, I could not motivate myself to post on here. I guess because when he is here I want to spend as much time with him as possible. It is no fun having an army man for a boyfriend. They always have to leave. 528 days away from him being home for good, but who is counting? *sigh* I will be able to see him again in May.
Whenever he is home, we make sure we eat at Panera Bread at least once. That is where we had our first date. (Though we did not realize it was a date until months later) Don't ask. We have kind of a backwards relationship....(He is the one that remembers the exact date of the first date and he remembers the anniversary...I think it is October 1st?)
It is a place that whenever I see it, I cannot help but smile. And, it feels weird eating there without him. It is our place. To eat without him just does not feel complete. I almost feel like I am cheating even though I know I am not.
There are so many places that have memories that I will not be able to erase.
My first house. My old sandboxw here I would be grounded to when I was younger. Then again grounding was not a punishment for me then. I found ways to make being grounded fun. I would sing to myself. It was not until I got older and they would ground me from the computer that it sucked. I mean I went years...YEARS without having the Internet. So why was being grounded from it the worse thing ever? It was my only source of a social life after 9pm. It was how I communicated with my friends. It was before everyone had call phones. Yes, there was such a time. You know those things called house phones? Everyone used to have one of those. Now they are overrated. Who has landlines now? Oh yeah, businesses.
My church has fond memories. My old high school. Hell, even my ex-boyfriend's apartments. Granted, he was not the best of men (everyone knows that but that is for another day), I made LOTS and LOTS of good memories there. He was my first love after all.
Hardee's. Ah Hardee's. 5 years of memories between two locations. I made friends there. Friends that I miss. Friends that I am planning on going to visit again someday.
Starbucks. JD's. In front of Bryan's house just talking until 2am. I really miss those late night talks. Those were the best! No matter how life goes on, memories always remain. Some good. Some bad. The bad are harder to forget but make you that much stronger.

There is not always a picture to describe it...

Okay imagination time. I did not have my camera on my latest bike ride. However, when I am riding my bike, I am in my own world. It is my happy place. I have no worries. I just enjoy the company of myself. While I was riding my bike, there was a young girl on a swing listening to her mp3 player. She was enjoying her own little world and for those brief few minutes was able to enjoy herself. She did not have to think about anyone else. She was able to enjoy her music and did not have to worry about anyone else. It is a freeing feeling, riding a bike. While you have to obey the laws in order to stay safe, you have no one else to worry about. There were several other bike riders while I was taking my trip. Mack Avenue is a busy road at one in the afternoon on Fridays. Those moments. The moments in which you can enjoy yourself. The moments when you can think about your life and contemplate everything that is going or not going on in it. Those are needed. Clearing your mind is a necessity. Letting everything build up inside of you is not healthy. Freeing your mind for a brief moment is relaxing...to say the least. Although, as much as I love riding my bike I am giving it a break for a little while. Because while riding my bike that last time I had a mini battle with a van. The van won. No big deal but my speed cable is broken. My escape from reality is briefly out of commission.